Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Of course the rapture is this Saturday......it's the gays fault!

Q: How many will be Raptured?
A: Campbell estimates 200 million. The remaining nearly 7 billion face a grisly fate - crushed in the quake, burned by sulfur, turned into pillars of salt, etc.

Q: Why May 21?
A: Camping calculates May 21 is exactly 7,000 years from the date of the Noah's Ark flood. In his book "Time Has an End," Camping writes. "The year 391 B.C. is the year when the Old Testament was finished, and 2,011 + 391 - 1 = 2,401, or 7 x 7 x 7 x 7." There you have it.


Q: Any other reason?
A: Yes. Gay Pride and same-sex marriage. Camping says God will punish America and the rest of the world for Gay Pride and same-sex marriages, just as Sodom and Gomorrah were punished with fire and brimstone in the Old Testament.


....Riiiiight.....


3 comments:

  1. Couldn't just stick to WAG numerology, could he? "It's God's schedule, take it up with him," just wasn't a good enough explanation. Nope, gotta blame Teh Gayz too. Niiiiiiiice.

    On the plus side, this does mean that when the world utterly fails to end on Saturday, it's a clear sign from God that we don't have too much gay pride and/or gay marriage. Right?

    Right?

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  2. Actually, I think we will have a better world once all the fundamentalists are "raptured" away.

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  3. That would be like cancelling my favorite sitcom....where shall I find entertainment after Saturday?

    Yep, I think Sunday morning would be a fine time to a comprehensive apology to the gay community.

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